Tradition has it that if a Jewish person has no where to attend a Passover seder, he or she may knock on the door and attend yours. As a Jew, it is your responsibility to welcome the stranger and let him or her partake of your meal. Of course, this tradition dates back many centuries and is not particularly suited to any current day Big City. Which is why my family was so flummoxed when, during our seder in Brooklyn some years ago, a man in a black coat and hat knocked on our door.

What's an urban family to do?

The truth is that in the current climate in the United States, people work all the time and live far away from their families, and, Passover often falls in the middle of the week, all of which leaves many Jews wandering around their metropolis in search of a seder. Even if a family is all together in a city, members may not have the time to organize the big event that a Seder is, or the space to hold one. And while this is an issue on other holidays, it is a special plight for Passover since it is a major Jewish holiday for which a primary ritual observance takes place in the home around a dinner table, rather than at a synagogue. This also makes it the holiday most easily translatable to celebrating in a restaurant, if restaurant owners would only agree.

Happily, many restaurant owners do agree, and strangers houses are now not the only places in town where a stray citizen can attend a seder. The only catch is that now you'd have to pay for it.

This seder-in-a-restaurant phenomenon is particularly noticeable in New York City, with it's relatively high concentration of Jews. Not only can one easily find a seder to attend, now one has choices. Are you glatt (super-duper) kosher? Kosher for Passover? Not kosher but traditional? Totally untraditional? Would you prefer acknowledging the holiday without actually sitting through a seder at all? Every Jew can have it all.

One of the leaders of this seder-out trend is the restaurant Capsouto Frères, which has been conducting its own special brand of holiday meal/charity dinner for the last ten years. The Capsouto brothers, Albert and Jacques, began hosting seders shortly after a group of terrorists bombed the synagogue in Istanbul. In light of their Turkish descent, the brothers felt compelled to come up with a way to help rebuild the temple. Passover was near, so they decided to hold a seder and donate the money to the temple. When they booked up the restaurants, all 100 seats, in a matter of days after publicizing the meal, they knew they were onto something bigger than a fund raiser. "Now, we do this primarily as a service for the Jewish community, and then secondarily as a benefit," says Albert Capsouto. "People come to our seder because it fills a need. More and more families are split up, so they don't necessarily have the impetus to do a whole seder, and, some people have lost touch with how to conduct one. This way, everyone can come together and celebrate."

The seder at Capsouto Frères uses a fairly traditional in the reading haggadah and a cantor leads the evening, but people who would prefer something more interpretative need look no further than Savoy, an eccentric Mediterranean eatery on the edge of SoHo. The story of Passover is personally narrated by Peter Hoffman, the chef and owner, who has compiled his own version of the haggadah, pulled mostly from "left-wing type sources."

"We type them [the haggadahs] up and distribute them around the dining room, and every year a few people end up taking them home. That way I can indoctrinate my guests with my own propaganda," Hoffman jokes.

Since neither of the seders at Savoy and Capsouto Freres are kosher, Conservative and some Orthodox Jews (those who live in the neighborhood and can walk to the meal) can celebrate at Tavern on the Green, with food catered by Levana, a kosher restaurant and caterer nearby. Taking over two of Tavern's largest rooms, Levana will offer two different seder options, a communal room, where a rabbi and cantor will officiate, and a family room, with tables of family groups making their own seder. This gives families the chance to go at their own pace and set the tone for their seder, while being served a kosher meal that someone else has prepared and will clean up.

Another trend in Passover meals that is becoming increasingly popular is the non-seder Passover menu, offered along side, or instead of, many restaurant's regular menus. This is an apt choice for people who want to somehow acknowledge the holiday, or, if they are not Jewish, experience the food, without having to participate in a seder. Cafe Crocodile has been serving a special Passover meal for the past eighteen years, complete with a seder plate and all the trimmings, which allows each table to conduct their own service.

Even if you do have a seder or two to attend, you might want to decline the invitation for one night and try out a meal at one of the restaurants offering their unique versions of different ethnic Passover meals (without the seder plate). At their upstairs cafe, Savoy will highlight different Sephardic traditions particular to Mediterranean Jews throughout the week of Passover. In midtown, Le Marais concentrates on the cooking of the French Jews formerly living in that eponymous neighborhood of Paris, while restaurants Lattanzi and Campagna offer Italian-Jewish specialties, mostly from Rome. This is a great way to experience something different from the brisket and gefilte fish that you might usually eat (in my family on both nights!).

Unfortunately for the man who-came-a-knockin' we were not able to share this wealth of information with him (who knew?), nor were we able to share our very unkosher, untraditional meal. Instead, we sent him off in the night to a more religious gathering. But we did offer him a cup of wine for his journey, which we poured into a dixie cup from the silver goblet of another, very honored guest. We figured that Elijah wouldn't mind.